Friday, May 18, 2012

"there's a battle ahead of you"

Edmond's seizures have decreased to 4-5 episodes a day. He was up to 20 before we started the topamax. And the ones he is having now are quick, less than 10 seconds long and come in clusters of 3 in a row at a time. The topamax has made him jittery or restless it seems. We are hoping this is not a longterm side effect. We will have to look into other treatment options if it becomes too much.  CCS is trying to deny him services, but i'm not worried about it, I know he qualifies, it's absurd that they are even trying to deny him. My neurologist is working on making sure they accept him as a client. CCS is California Children Services and our first line of service in regards to any equipment needs he will have now or in the future. Edmond is quickly approaching his 1st year birthday which we are all excited about. He is so beautiful and handsome and cuddly and kissable. We love him to pieces. Giving him his medication is a little more involving since he takes two and one has to be mixed into food, the other is liquid. I am expected to return to work full time on June 11th, and I am a little anxious about how my mornings will be trying to get Edmond's medication in him daily before I leave, and then I can give him his night dose when I get home from work. Breathe in, breath out... here we go... back to my crazy job.  Um, PRAY FOR ME! 

I recently received an email from a close friend of my family who was looking in her prayer
journal and came across a word that God had given her-- for me --back in 2009 and wanted 
to remind me of it in regards to all that we are going through with Edmond. 

 The word was... “There’s a battle ahead of you and its going to get so intense that at times you will feel like giving up- but you must hold on, and ENDURE the battle. Verily I say unto you, at the end of the tunnel the Lord will give you Victory and all glory will be given to His name. Therefore, ENDURE the battle“!! Read Psalm 20

I remember at the time that I was given this "word" from this woman I wasn't happy about it. My dad had recently passed in 2008 and I was up to my elbows in grief and weariness wanting a break from life's difficulties. I found that break in marrying my husband and in becoming pregnant with Eden. These two joys have sustained me through so much pain. I still dont understand why God is doing what He is doing, but I'm still trusting him and enduring this battle that I am praying He fights for me, because I cannot fight this kind of battle, it is too great for a parent's heart to bear really. We all have something hard to bear, I still believe God will help us if we allow him. 

Psalm 20
May the Lord answer you when you are in distress;
may the name of the God of Jacob protect you.
May he send you help from the sanctuary and grant you support from Zion. 
May he remember all your sacrifices and accept your burnt offerings.
May he give you the desire of your heart and make all your plans succeed.
 May we shout for joy over your victory 
and lift up our banners in the name of our God
May the Lord grant all your requests.
 Now this I know:
    The Lord gives victory to his anointed.
 He answers him from his heavenly sanctuary
    with the victorious power of his right hand.
Some trust in chariots and some in horses,
 but we trust in the name of the Lord our God.
 They are brought to their knees and fall,
but we rise up and stand firm.
 Lord, give victory to the king!
    Answer us when we call!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

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